Prayer

Prayer

Every Monday morning, I pray you have a good week
Every evening, I pray you fall in to a sound sleep 

Every Friday, I pray your weekend will be safe

Every Sunday, I pray you are in a peaceful place

And sometimes, when I’m feeling selfish, I pray you will be mine again 

An atheist caught in a cycle of prayer. 

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A wise friend once told me, patience is a virtue.

You were right.

So I’ll wait for you.

Seconds, minutes, hours. Days, months, weeks and years.

I’ll wait.

Don’t worry, my love, I am not actively awaiting your return.

You would not want that, and I am tired of being sad.

Just know, I’ll always be yours.

I am sprung on you, my love, and I do need you back.

Just not today.

And probably not tomorrow.

But I’ll be waiting, sweetness.

Yours truly,

Audisho

Fake ass bitch

Fake ass bitch

Happiness just seems so fake to me. 

Happiness is Yeezy’s bought at a flea market.

Happiness is a counterfeit Benjamin.

Happiness is faux fur trenchs.

Happiness is a Louis Vuitton bag bought off a street cart in NYC.

Happiness simply is some designer shit were all trying to cop but can’t so we just front some knock off bullshit.

HAPPINESS IS FAKE!

Nightmare

Nightmare

You were in my dream last night.

I vaguely remember where we were.

You sat on a lime green salon chair.

I have never been here before.

You look handsome per usual.

I do not know remember why we were together.

You were evil.

I sit in your lap.

We kiss.

You push me off into the next chair.

I cry.

“You are too much for me,” you say.

I sit in your lap.

We kiss.

You push me off into the next chair.

I cry.

“You are too much for me,” you say.

I sit in your lap.

We repeated over and over until I woke up.

I am subconsciously plaguing myself with a symbol of our relationship.

You were in my nightmare last night.

 

 

Missing

Missing

How did we get lost?

I miss you.

The love we made, laughs we had, thoughts we shared, and highs we experimented with.

I miss it all.

I need you.

Your kind nature, ritualistic behavior, reserved conscious, and patient demeanor.

I need it all.

“Hello 911, what’s your emergency?”

“Hi, I’d like to file a missing persons report.”

Repentance

Repentance

I am an atheist, but I pray for you.

My blessing, my faith, my scripture–you.

My faith has been shattered;however, you have provided me hope.

For only a Godly being could be as captivating as you. 

My biggest sin & greatest indulgence–you.

A cult & I’m your following. 

Please God forgive me.

I’ve fallen victim to a bad religion.

Despite your evils, I bow at your alter & worship on my knees.

I drink your wine until I’m drunk. 

The least holy communion. 

Please God forgive me. 

Petals

Petals

Your love is like a rose.

Stunning red petals. 
Sweet enticing scent. 

Painfully gorgeous adorned with thorns.

Despite the blood you draw, I always return to pick your fragrant flowers.

Your thorns slice my skin, but your roots run rampant in my veins.

What I would do to have a bouquet of your flowers adorning every surface of my home.

What I would do to spend my days forever lying on a bed of roses. 

What I would do to forever relish in your aroma and admire your oh so bittersweet beauty. 

As your petals fall, so do my tears, but I will forever stumble to the garden to harvest your love.